Child support is one of many issues that might arise between contesting parties that can be mediated. Typically, when a mediator raises the issue of child support in the mediation process, he or she will consider two types of expenses:
- Those that happen on a regular or recurring basis – this type of expense generally includes things like rent/mortgage payments, real estate taxes, automobile expenses, utilities, food (including school lunch money), medical and dental insurance, clothes, personal care (haircuts, cosmetics, and health products), and entertainment (such as eating out, bowling, or going to the movies).
- Those that happen on an irregular or non-recurring basis –this type of expense generally includes child care expenses (baby sitters, summer camp), education (private school or nursery school), school supplies (including uniforms), school trips, medical and dental co-pays/ medical gifts for child’s friends (for birthday parties), sporting goods, hobbies, toys, extracurricular activities (lessons, clubs, scouting trips and organization participation), tutoring, psychotherapy, and college.
Once an approximate expense record is determined, the mediator will then work with the two parties to come up with an amount that is proportionate and fair to each parent. This means that the mediator will look at both parents’ wages (if both are wage earners), significant assets, potential investment or trust income, and other factors that are not related to income (such as the amount of assistance each will receive from family members and who is the primary custodial parent). The amount of monthly child support payments to cover the regular expenses will be determined and the mediator will also discuss with the parties how the irregular expenses will be handled.
This type of mediated child support arrangement is often better than court-ordered child support, since the process of mediation is done in such a way as to allow each party the opportunity to participate in the discussion. Mediation tends to keep anger and resentment at a minimum – something that is extremely useful when two parties are discussing what is best for the children involved in a divorce or separation.
Since the mediation process is legally binding once a resolution has been made, neither party has to worry about the outcome being less enforceable than what it would have been if the courts had determined it. This makes the mediation process – particularly as it relates to child support payments – a win-win situation for all parties (including the children) involved in the conflict.