Going through a divorce or dealing with on-going parental conflict is difficult and disruptive for all involved.  Without proper safeguards the process of ending a marriage or parenting after divorce can be emotionally overwhelming, legally daunting, and financially devastating.   Unfortunately, the adversarial legal process is not structured to provide a diplomatic marital ending or facilitate a smooth transition from marriage partner to parenting partner; nor does it provide cost-effective or timely assistance when parents struggle with on-going conflict.  In my opinion, the traditional legal system devours substantial financial resources and fractures families – it’s like pouring gasoline on a fire.  I learned the hard way with my own divorce and now I am dedicated to helping my clients succeed in spite of the crisis.

– A Unique Perspective

As a divorced parent of two school-aged children and a step-parent, I am uniquely qualified to provide parenting services for conflicted parents. I have walked a similar path, shared similar frustrations, felt similar concerns and fears. I’ve experienced an adversarial divorce and its negative impact on parenting. I’ve used mediation and hired a Parenting Consultant. My parenting partner and I transformed our high conflict relationship into an effective and cooperative parenting partnership and I know how to help you succeed too.

I believe children need and want both parents to be significantly involved in their lives. Fathers and Mothers are each irreplaceable—they are the only two people who can give their children what they need from a mother or father.

I believe parents are experts about their family’s life. All of my services are client-centered and encourage self-determination. My clients are empowered to control their own outcomes.

I believe parenting partners need a parenting bridge between their individual and separate lives in order to succeed. I know how to help you build your own parenting bridge and I know how to help you succeed.

Our Mediation Process

How Does The Mediation Process Work?

There are 6 stages of mediation.

1. Introductory remarks
2. Statement of the problems and issues by the  parties
3. Information gathering
4. Identification of the problems
5. Bargaining and generating options
6. Reaching agreement

Introductory Remarks

The mediator will wait until both parties are present and then make introductions.  The physical setting will be controlled so that no party feels threatened

The opening statement during the introductory remarks will  lay out the ground rules for the mediation. These ground rules are what helps  the mediation go smoothly. The mediator will usually ask that if attorneys are  present, they can concur, but the clients should speak for themselves. Parties  should not interrupt each other. The mediator will give each party the  opportunity to fully share their side of the story.

Statement of the  Problems and Issues by the Parties

Each person is given the opportunity to tell their story uninterrupted. If there are  lawyers present who make the initial statement, the clients will then be asked  to make their own statements.

Information Gathering

The mediator will ask the parties open-ended questions. The mediator will repeat back key ideas to the  parties, and will summarize often.

Problem  Identification

This might also be part of other segments. The mediator tries to find common goals between the parties. The mediator will figure out which issues are  going to be able to settle or those that will settle first.

Bargaining and  Generating Options / Reaching an Agreement

Methods for developing options may include group process, discussion groups  or sub groups, developing hypothetical plausible scenarios. It may include a  mediator's proposal where a proposal is put on the table and the parties take  turns modifying it.

Once the participants are committed to achieving a  negotiated settlement, the mediator will propose a brainstorming session to  explore potential solutions. This can lead to a final agreement, which diffuses  the conflict and provides a new basis for future relations.

The mediator may also decide to hold private sessions with  both parties in order to move negotiations along. This caucus session will be  confidential. It provides a safe environment in which to brainstorm and surface  any underlying fears or concerns. The goal of this session is to find some  common ground by exploring many options, and to bring about possible solutions  for the parties to think about. Parties can also entertain alternative  solutions to their problems without committing themselves to offering the  solutions as concessions.

Reaching Agreement

When an agreement has been reached, the mediator  puts  its main provisions in writing.

Once an agreement has been made, the parties have a starting point for which to  begin different relationships.  If all  the participants view the process as fair, they are more likely to take the  results seriously.